Ariel goes to Cali

I'm having a bad day...

2007-06-08T08:52:00.000-07:00

It's going to be a hectic day at work... and I was anxious before I even got to campus today...

And then it hit me. I'm supposed to be graduating tomorrow.

All the people that I started with... many are already graduated (last year with a 2-year degree) or are graduating tomorrow.

And I'm not.

IknowIknowIKNOW that I'm not supposed to be graduating. IknowIknowIKNOW that I am within God's will for me that I take my time and pay for school as I go, so I don't incur a huge amount of debt. IknowIknowIKNOW that there are great things for me on the horizon...

But it doesn't stop my heart from aching to be wearing my cap, gown and hood today and tomorrow.

I'm an AUNTIE!!!!!!

2007-05-31T09:07:00.000-07:00

My little brother and his wife gave birth to a baby boy today!!!!

David Christian
8 lbs 15 oz
21 inches
9.21 am (EDT)

Oh how I wish I were there to hold this precious new life!!!!
Anyone wanna fly me to Florida?? :P

The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis

2007-05-21T22:33:00.000-07:00

Ok... Let's try this again.

Who: 8 folkses
What: Production of The Great Divorce
When: Friday, May 25 and Saturday, May 26 @ 7.30pm
Where: Travis Auditorium
Why: KristiAnne Hough's WTA Grad Project
How much: nada!! Tickets are free - although there is a suggested donation of $5 if you can swing it. But it you can't, come anyway!!

I'm looking forward to it!!

I DID IT!!!!

2007-05-17T16:40:00.000-07:00

Well, my friends and family (and strangers, if you read this...)

I CUT MY HAIR!!

It was waist length again... and I was getting annoyed. So I cut it.

I now have a pony-tail of 11" to donate to Locks of Love. If you don't know about this organization, I highly recommend you get to know it! And if you have long hair and plan on cutting it off anyway, consider donating!!

Pictures will be up later tonight or tomorrow.

The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis

2007-05-13T16:52:00.000-07:00

So... If you're in the Pasadena area and wanna check it out... there is a production of The Great Divorce going up Friday, May 25 and Saturday, May 26.

A cast of 8.
Black-box style.
Travis auditorium.
Tickets will be in the range of $5-7 (possibly free for Fuller folks).
Proceeds are going to pay for the production. Profits above and beyond production costs will be donated (TBD). No one is making money on the show.

Come and support a Fuller student graduating... and enjoy a good show!! :)

Me? A writer??

2007-04-29T16:55:00.000-07:00

I don't think so...

But... I have this idea. Actually, I have had this idea for quite awhile now, but never did anything about it. Michelle challenged me the other day to do something about it, or someone else would beat me to the punch.

Interesting thought.

Now, of course, I'm trying to take this idea... and make it make sense. And protect it from being torn to bits or laughed at once it's done.

Me? A writer??

Apparently.

There are a zillion of me...

2007-04-28T21:08:00.000-07:00

It's not my fault I have a common name. I don't even really blame my parents.... much. :P

But...

HowManyOfMe.com

There are
1,547
people with my name
in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?

Apparently I'm one of 1547 Jennifer Howard's in the US. Makes me feel pretty safe putting my name here! *giggle*

**Note: Thanks to JJ for the link... he had this on his blog and I poached it from him.

Satisfying AND happy, huh?

2007-04-19T08:48:00.000-07:00

I guess they aren't referring to the process of becoming clergy... just BEING clergy once we get there!

10 most satisfying jobs

Reality....

2007-03-31T14:40:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had that experience when you are so caught up in planning and preparing for something that the reality doesn't sink in?

For example:

My best friend Michelle married the wonderful and amazing Paul - creating a new family and starting a new journey. I KNOW in my head that this means things will be different... I KNOW that she is different in some way.... but it didn't occur to me until after the processional yesterday that it was REAL. I was blissfully engrossed in planning and details until that moment.... and I got hit in the chest.... HARD...

I'm sooooo excited for them. I KNOW God has blessed them and prepared them and ordained them (had to say this.... Michelle will understand!). I KNOW that God will continue to bless then and their relationship. I don't wish her singleness back....

But I wonder what this will be like for us now. And I don't think I'd really taken the time to wonder until today.

And then there's Chris. About to embark on journey of another sort. Called to a church in the Netherlands... moving tomorrow... giving away the rest of his stuff today. It was strange to stand together, chatting and laughing and remembering... and realize that from tomorrow onward, we'll have to chat on IM or email or blogs or something. That I won't see him, in person, until this summer.... and then.... who knows how long after that.

I don't wish him back to Pasadena. His calling to the Netherlands is fantastic and Godly and just right for him. Moving him forward in his faith and in his ministry. But, selfishly, I will miss him here. His friendship, his music, his writing.... and his presence. Finally putting Chris into the right corner of my heart... knowing where we stand as friends... and wondering how that will play out over the thousands of miles that are about to be between us.

God is doing amazing things in the lives of my friends. And I'm just beginning to look up from the planning and preparation to see the reality... not far away on some distant horizon.... but here, up close, in my room with me.... waiting for me to embrace it and learn to run with it.

God.... grant me the strength and peace to walk in Your reality... and not to bury my head in my own planning.

10 minutes and 34 bobby pins...

2007-03-31T00:13:00.000-07:00

to wash my face clean and take my hair down from it's lovely 'do.

Michelle and Paul tied the knot today.... wow.

There is much to say, but it will wait while I process.

More than once I was told that I should be a wedding coordinator in real life too... interesting thought.

More on that when my eyes will stay open...

Why so quiet?

2006-11-15T19:23:00.000-08:00

Well... when there is just so much happening in your life, it's hard to talk about it all.

Let's just say it's been a long and interesting quarter. I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving with Michelle's family in the East Bay! And I'm really looking forward to Christmas break in Florida.

I need something about which to write... and I have a thought. I'll save it for another night.

Something that HAS been happening is a wedding!! And no, sadly, it's not mine (yet). I think I have to be dating someone before a wedding will happen... :p
But... Michelle and Paul are getting married on March 30!! I am so totally excited for them.
For their sakes, and mine, here is a link to their page on The Knot. Now we can stop searching for it all the time!!

Fear not, friends and family. I didn't fall off the face of the earth... I just took some time off to live life in the real world.

It's been a little while...

2006-09-29T15:09:00.000-07:00

... but now school has started, my hours at work are more stable, and life is interesting!

There is something very interesting brewing... and I might tell y'all about it in a week or so when I get back from a visit to San Francisco! :)

I made it to Florida!

2006-09-07T18:56:00.000-07:00

JetBlue turns out to be a great airline to fly. I had a GREAT flight.

First of all - it was almost empty. I'm not kidding. MAYBE 30 people on the flight. I had my whole row to myself... and could have had the 3 rows in front of me, too!!!

We took off on-time... no problems. The flight was fine. No trouble.

And then... then we got to Florida. Oh boyohboyohboy!!
So... I looked up at one point, and on the little "watch where we fly" mappy-thingy on the TV in the next seat over... I saw that we were 1/2 way between Orlando and MIAMI. I mean, we'd missed Orlando by a long shot. And it wasn't just an inprecise reading on the screen... we were OBVIOUSLY off course.

And then the pilot came on and filled us in. Apparently, there was a storm in O-town... and so we had to approach from the South. This redirect has us flying all over central Florida. If you could have seen that map - it was really funny!! Everytime we got close to Orlando and headed in the right direction we would get redirected and make a big swing in another direction. It actually was quite comical.

Finally... we landed at MCO. YAY! We're on the ground. So I called Mom to let her know that we were running late, but I was finally on the ground. While we were on the phone, the pilot came back on the intercom and informed us that we had to sit on the taxi-way for awhile. A ramp that we needed to cross was closed because of the lightening. Yes... I was already on the ground and they grounded us because of 'lectricity.

Anyway.... my 3.45 landing became a 5.10 meet with dad in the atrium of MCO. Then it got good, 'cause my bag was coming around the belt just as soon as we got down there. No damage. No waiting.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Adventures in travelling.

Tomorrow... funness and NIGHT OF JOY!!!!

I'm very excited.

One last thing:

Happy Birthday, Nick!!!

Next 3 Movie Reviews - A Fairy Tale Trio

2006-09-02T11:54:00.000-07:00

Akeelah and the Bee

A Live-Action Fairy Tale… complete with fairy tale ending. Sooooo sweet! And well done. I mean, really, Lawrence Fishburn and Angela Bassett?!?! It couldn’t lose. The little girl who plays Akeelah is great as well.

I loved the straightforwardness (is that a word?) when dealing with her life at home. The embarrassment, the willingness to do anything to hide her home life, the way she essentially pretends the pain away… and then how it gets addressed. Yes… totally fairy tale. It wouldn’t have been this neat and clean in real life.

I also like that, despite being a fairy tale, they didn’t go for the easy stuff. No romance between single mom and teacher. No reunion with teacher and his estranged wife. No group hug over the grave of his daughter. That saved it from being totally cheesy and over-the-top, I think.

It fits with my fairy tale obsession and I will probably own this one someday.

Coach Carter (DVD)

This fairy tale is the best because… it’s REAL. This is the slighty-dramatized real story of Ken Carter and the Richmond (CA) Oilers HS basketball team. The draw for me was the “real story” and Samuel L. Jackson! I mean, really, who can pass him up? Ladies, are ya with me on this one?

What I loved is the grittiness of the team, the roughness of the neighborhood… and the triumph in the end. It was cool that they didn’t win the big game at the end (sorry to spoil it, but there it is)… mostly ‘cause it saves it from being over-the-top! (Kinda like in Akeelah.)

I already own it and have seen it several times. The one pivotal scene when Timo stands up and quote the Nelson Mandela speech (see my earlier blog posting) makes me cry everytime! First because of the quote… and second because of the great story-telling that has been happening and what this scene represents to the story as a whole.

Whale Rider (DVD)

Whoa! I seem to have gone on a fairy tale binge! This one hails from New Zealand and is a story about breaking down stereotypes and patriarchal traditions in favor of understanding people and the gifts they have. Learning to look beyond our expectations to see the reality – even if it flies in the face of tradition.

Keisha Castle-Hughes does a WONDERFUL job of playing the heroine. What an amazing girl. And what I like the best is that she is not beautiful in the traditional American movie sensibility… and yet her beauty shines on the screen. She’s wonderful.

While most people don’t like the romantic drivel that I tend to like, what I *do* think people will enjoy is the wonderful story of triumph over adversity. And the quiet, strong way that Paikea leads her people, even before really understanding what is going on in her life.

First 3 Movie Reviews

2006-09-02T10:58:00.000-07:00

Serenity (DVD)

An interesting flick that I don’t think I would have ever thought to watch. But Alan, in his wisdom, knew better and invited me over to watch. I really liked it, and think I need to see it again to get some more…

I was totally sucked into the story, and never really had my “suspension of disbelief” broken. That is key for me in a movie… but especially in a sci-fi-western-type (as Alan called it). The sci-fi aspect tends to make me more skeptical, so the fact that this one had me through the whole thing says a lot for the storytelling!!

It’s been awhile since I’ve seen it… so I can’t remember a lot… but I know that I liked it, was surprised at how I liked it, and intend to see it again. Also, it made me want to watch Firefly (the short-lived show that precedes the movie) in order to get the whole story.

All-in-all a good flick that I would see again! (Hey, Alan, wanna have another movie night? :) )

The Devil Wears Prada

This was a fun movie that was a real bit of social commentary on our cultural obsession with looks, beauty and fashion. Anne Hathaway, long one of my favorite actresses, does a remarkable job pulling off the frumpy-to-fabulous look needed for her part. While some of the content might make you cringe, if you take it for the sarcastic, dry-witted, social commentary I think it is supposed to be, you will like it.

Not a classic. Not an award shoe-in. But a great movie that was both entertaining and thought-provoking.

Oh… and there are a couple of scenes where the editing is just beautiful (the editor should get an award or 2, but probably won’t)!!! Totally impressed.

I’d see it again… and might consider owning it. It was that good.

Pirates of the Carribbean: Dead Man's Chest

*swoon* Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom!!! Depp is back as the ridiculous, lovable, and slightly-odd pirate. And I loved it! This one is WAAAAAAAAAAY more dark than the first… and I would NOT take the kiddies to see it. Definitely wanna check it out first, parents, before taking your kids.

There are some fantastic scenes that were absolutely hysterical the first time ‘round! The impact they had on me was amazing. I went back and saw it a second time and they weren’t as funny… definitely more silly-leaning-towards-stupid. But… awesome the first time. I think the power for those scenes came from the shock value in the first viewing.

I’ll tell ya… the ending had me on the edge of my seat and I can’t WAIT for the 3^rd one!!! And not just ‘cause I wanna see Depp and Bloom again. *swoon*

OK... I promised them awhile ago... it's time to get started.

2006-08-31T12:33:00.000-07:00

Here is a list of movies I've seen this summer (it's a LONG list... how'd that happen?)!

Reviews coming... some by end of day today (I hope).

Serenity (DVD)
The Devil Wears Prada
Pirates of the Carribbean: Dead Man's Chest
Akeelah and the Bee
Coach Carter (DVD)
Whale Rider (DVD)
A Prairie Home Companion
DaVinci Code
Invincible
I think there might be more... (I'll edit this list as I work on 'em)

I'm such a klutz!!

2006-08-31T09:30:00.000-07:00

For anyone reading this who DIDN'T already know this... now you do.

Ask me about my stories (like in a comment, maybe?) and I'll tell ya some.

But... I mention this 'cause I did it again. But I have reason to praise God, too.

On Monday night (or was it Tuesday?), Michelle and I went to Old Town for an Ice Cream Sundae! We were talk about how klutzy I am (and how klutzy someone else I know is!). And when we got back to the car, I stepped off the curb funny and twisted my left ankle.

Yes... same ankle I broke in my most klutzy moment. Same ankle I then re-injured on my first day of a 2 week trip to Italy. *sigh* I'm doomed.

Anyway... I was really worried because it REALLY hurt, but I could put weight on it and move it 'round and 'round. So, I was pretty sure I hadn't broken it. (Remember, I *KNOW* what it feels like to break it... this is old hat stuff for me.)

So I rested it, and kept it up most of the day yesterday (and DIDN'T walk around much at all). It was feeling better, but I couldn't risk it.

This morning, I can almost walk normally. Hardly a limp!!! Woohoo!! God is good. I was beginning to have visions of trying to navigate Night of Joy in a wheelchair again (yes... I said again!). It still hurts... and I will continue to baby it for the next week, buuuuuuuuuuuuuut... I should be good for NoJ!!

Thank you, God, for looking out for me. 'Cause obviously I don't do it very well for myself!

YES!!!!!!!!

2006-08-30T10:34:00.000-07:00

"Memories...."

2006-08-28T21:35:00.000-07:00

Inspired by my friend Jim and his discovery of the 1, 2, 3, 4-5... song from Sesame Street... I went looking for another fav from Sesame Street...

I dedicate this one to Michelle...

A quote that keeps coming back to me

2006-08-28T15:07:00.000-07:00

In various forms and places...

From Coach Carter:
Timo Cruz says it this way: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

From Akeelah and the Bee:
Akeelah reads it from a plaque on Dr. Larabee's wall: "Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate; our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure."

And I think Michelle quotes it somewhere on her blog... or... maybe I'm thinking of the Maya Angelou poem Phenomenal Woman... whatever.

This blog looks at the whole thing and who said what when...

The point is... it's important to me right now. And I think I understand it on a level that I'm not ready to talk about yet...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate,
but that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.
And, as we let our own light shine,
we consciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

Ummm... apparently I'm famous...

2006-08-24T11:06:00.000-07:00

... and kinda old.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jennifer_Howard

Aaaaaaaahhhhhhh!

2006-08-24T10:57:00.000-07:00

Where is the time going?

How in the world did I become a 3rd year in seminary? Never mind that there will probably be at least a portion of a 4th... I meant to leave here after 2!!

Where did summer go? Didn't I just go to Alabama and meet some really cool people and see some amazing things happen in our church? Didn't I just start new hours at my job? How is it almost September?

Didn't I just post that sermon a week ago? Didn't I ever write the movie reviews yet? I mean, I watch the movies... and of course y'all want to know what I thought right?

*sigh*

Someone is getting more of my time than usual. ;)

And summer has been good.

And I'll be going to Florida soon to see the fam! And a really cool concert!

More to come... maybe this weekend while everyone I know is busy putting all the Presbyterian Theology, polity, worship and exegesis they know on paper. My prayers are with everyone who is taking the Ords. They start tomorrow and I know they're all stressed and nervous. I pray that God will bless each of you with His peace.

ok... back to work... and maybe some daydreaming...

Here's why the movie reviews have been on hold...

2006-07-09T19:52:00.000-07:00

I preached this morning. And last Sunday God really challenged me with a text that was tough!

My first sermon was on Palm Sunday and was in my own personal style - it was very clearly a "me" sermon. Fun to do and a topic that I really like.

My second sermon was more of a storytelling one - again, something I love. Another facet of me and myself as a preacher explored... with positive results.

So this time around, God was really challenging me to bring a hard word with love. I'll admit to being scared that perhaps people would be offended, rather than touched. So far, the reviews are positive and it seems that God used me to make people think! Woohoo!!!

EDIT: Here is a link to the Final Report from the Theological Task Force on Peace, Unity and Purity of the Church. I reference this report in the sermon below.

On to the text:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two Ears but Only One Mouth
James 1.16-21

A sermon delivered by Jennifer Howard at the First Presbyterian Church of Burbank
09 July 2006

Pray with me:

May the words of my mouth and the meditations of all our hearts be acceptable to You, O Lord, our Rock and our Redeemer. Amen.

Introduction

So… how many of you have a sibling? Raise your hands. Ok keep them up… now… whoever has, or has had, a parent or parental figure, raise your hands. Great. How about anyone who has ever had a best friend, raise your hands. Anyone who has ever met a person other than themselves – raise your hands? Great. I think we have everyone. You can put them down now, thanks.

No more hands, but I’d like you to think about these questions; You can nod your head, smile at me, give me a thumbs up, something…

Have you ever shared a home with someone? Have you ever had a roommate? Have you ever been in a small group? On a committee? On a sports team? In a fraternity or sorority?

Then you understand what we’re going to be talking about today. Unity. Togetherness. Accord. And once you bring together more than one person, unity is something that you have to work for. Rarely… and I would dare to say “Never”… is it possibly for two or more people to always agree on everything. It just doesn’t happen. So… if that is the case, how are we, the church, supposed to be united? How do we achieve a sense of togetherness and accord as the Body of Christ? I think James had some “helpful hints” for us in this letter, and we’ll get into that in a minute. But first…

Most of you know that I went to General Assembly, and many know a little something about what happened there. I decided that, rather than avoid the topic all-together, today might be a good day to share a bit. But I didn’t want to preach GA. That’s not what we’re here to do. We’re here to hear from God. I felt like GA would be a good example and source for information for a sermon – but it is not what should be preached. Scripture is to be preached. God’s word. And so, we’re looking at a Scripture lesson that is really very relevant to the church today.

James opens his letter with a greeting “To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations”. He might be, and possibly was, referring to Jewish Christians scattered around the world at that time. This letter was circulated so that everyone would get the chance to read it. But James’ whole letter is, more generally, a letter to the church. To all churches. To First Pres Burbank. To Thompson Memorial Pres, my home church. To the PC(USA). To all denominations and all churches that call Jesus Christ: Lord and Savior. In it we find James’ love for this community and desire to see the church be united in love at all times. What I don’t think that means is that we must always agree on everything. Just like in families or with a roommate or a sibling – you don’t always agree… more often than not, you don’t agree. But, you love. And you work together.

With that background and this idea floating around in our heads, let’s listen to the passage again. Listen for James’ love for his audience, his focus on God and his passion for the community. And see if you can see how James understands community and unity to exist:

So don't be misled, my dear brothers and sisters. Whatever is good and perfect comes to us from God above, who created all heaven's lights. Unlike them, he never changes or casts shifting shadows. In his goodness he chose to make us his own children by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his choice possession.

My dear brothers and sisters, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Your anger can never make things right in God's sight. So get rid of all the filth and evil in your lives, and humbly accept the message God has planted in your hearts, for it is strong enough to save your souls.

A Community of Truth

Don’t be misled. Don’t be deceived. It is so easy to be confused and led innocently astray. One of the first things James warns against is deception. But how are we to fight against this? What are we to do to not be deceived? Isn’t that really the fault of the deceiver? Well, yes, in a way. But we are responsible too. We can guard ourselves from deception and being misled by arming ourselves with… truth. If we seek to be knowledgeable, we can fight deception and misinformation.

Most of you are aware that there was one report at General Assembly that was getting most of the press: the report of the Theological Task Force on Peace, Unity, and Purity of the Church. You don’t have to raise your hands, but how many of you have actually read the report itself? Not commentaries or articles about it, but the actual report. I hadn’t either before I was selected to attend GA. But I found out that it’s not that long, and really not that hard to read – I was surprised. I expected it to be this massive book that was full of jargon that would mean nothing to me! Instead I found a document that was fairly easy to read and very interesting.

I’m not going to get into what the report says; that would take forever. Rather, I mention the PUP report (its little nickname) because this is a good example of not being deceived. The media, starting the night we voted on this report and continuing in earnest the next morning, has been reporting their own take on the vote… even to the point of mis-reporting the actions taken by the General Assembly. Rather than trust the media’s interpretation of this document, wouldn’t it be smarter to read it ourselves, discuss it together, pray about what it means and what God intends, and then come to our own understanding of what it says and what this vote means?

And what about God’s role in all of this? Isn’t God really the source of all knowledge and truth? Shouldn’t we perhaps look to God to reveal the truth? James wrote: Unlike [the lights of heaven], [God] never changes… Unlike the lights of heaven, unlike God’s own creation… God never changes. The implication here is that, if God never changes and that is ‘unlike’ creation, then we must be changing – and not always for the better! God, who never changes, can be our source of truth. We should be seeking knowledge and understanding and truth for ourselves and trusting in God to provide it.

A Community of Love

Ephesians says: We will hold to the truth in love, becoming more and more in every way like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. Under his direction, the whole body is fitted together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.

Truth alone is not enough. James doesn’t stop with the idea of preventing deception. He goes on to talk about love. I know, you’re all looking at the James passage now, or at least thinking back to it, and wondering where you missed the word love. Relax. You didn’t miss it. But love is there just the same. James’ language is full of images of parental love – choosing to make us children, giving us something precious: his true word, and thinking of us as his ‘choice possession’, His favorite piece of art in the collection.

Having established God’s love for us, James moves on to talk about how, as beloved children of the Creator, we are to show that love to each other. It looks to me like James doesn’t trust us to just say “love each other as God has loved you”. Reminding us of his love for us “my dear brothers and sisters”, James gives us three things to do in order to show love to each other. Three steps to ensure love and fellowship within community.

Be quick to listen. First things first, right? But the first thing to do isn’t to preach, or write a paper about how right we are, or to gather forces together for our side of things. Instead, the first thing we are to do is listen to each other. And quickly. Listen, not just hear, which implies thoughtful attention; listening that is intent on understanding the other before speaking. James is asking us to be quick, because it needs to be our first response. We need to put aside our desire to respond and then we need to listen – actively listen. Listen with our ears and our minds and our hearts. Focus our attention on the other person and really try to understand everything they are saying and not saying.

In my Church History classes at Fuller, John Thompson would have us write 3 papers each quarter. The assignments were to read documents written by key theologians from this time period and then write a paper summarizing their point of view on a particular topic; for example: Martin Luther on Freedom or John Calvin on Predestination. The challenge is to write a paper that accurately reflects what the original author was trying to communicate as a way for us to prove that in reading them (in essence, listening to them) we have actually heard what they said.

Be slow to speak. This goes hand-in-hand with the listening, really. In being quick to listen, we have to resist the desire to start talking immediately. We need to leave room to actually listen to the whole story from the other side, and listen for God’s voice in the situation before we speak. Slow to speak doesn’t imply unintelligence. Rather, it is the intelligent person that will take the time to fully understand the other’s position before speaking. This prevents us from saying things that are inappropriate or incorrect. Because if we misunderstand, we take the chance of causing anger in ourselves and in those around us. Which leads us to James’ third point:

Be slow to get angry. Your anger can never make things right in God’s sight. Our anger prevents us from really listening to each other. It makes us start to work internally on our response to this person who has been a catalyst for our anger, rather than hear what they have to say. James is clear – our anger is never going to correct things. I don’t think that it is something that should never happen – Jesus himself got very angry and overturned the money changers’ tables in the Temple – but it wasn’t meant as the overall solution, but as a catalyst for change. Anger can be an effective tool to address problems, but only when based in fact and directed appropriately. That’s why all anger needs to be slow – even righteous indignation – because sometimes our anger can be misplaced because of misinformation or misunderstanding. Being slow gives us time to really consider the implications of our anger.

I am sure that most, if not all of you, have heard the phrase “God gave us two ears and only one mouth for a reason.” Here it is, in James. Listen first – and to use the quote, twice as much. Having listened, speak truth in love. Take into consideration what you have heard and speak in reply. It’s what makes a real conversation. And finally, be slow to get angry. Be careful about how much and how often you let your anger get stirred. We don’t see much anger from Jesus in the scriptures – so that when we do it is even more powerful and important.

A Community of Salvation

So far James has spoken about a community of truth, a community of love and finally (in this passage anyway) we read about a community of Salvation. So get rid of all the filth and evil in your lives, and humbly accept the message God has planted in your hearts, for it is strong enough to save your souls. Being honest and loving with each other brings about a desire to remove the evil and embrace the good that God himself has planted within us. Humility allows us to see and accept this message – which is our salvation. God is the source of that word, God gives us the power to see it, and as a result, God saves. What an encouraging word from James that is: It is not our power to be perfect or holy. It is not our knowledge that we acquire. It is not our own strength. For [God’s message planted in your hearts] is strong enough to save your souls.

God is strong enough.

I was humbly reminded of this during the General Assembly. Just before discussion began on the PUP report we stopped business for a few minutes, stood and prayed together as a community. We prayed for love, forgiveness, wisdom, guidance, peace, humility… you name an emotion or need and I’m sure that somewhere on the floor someone was praying for it. After an open time for prayer, Joan Gray, our new moderator, began singing from her podium, joined by the end of the first line by most of the people gathered in that hall:

Spirit of the Living God fall afresh on me
Spirit of the Living God fall afresh on me
Melt me, mold me, fill me, use me
Spirit of the Living God fall afresh on me

The assembly of over 700 stood and pleaded for the Holy Spirit to fall upon us and be a part of our discussions. And let me tell you, the spirit fell. It was a powerful moment to witness and words cannot describe that moment in time. But I knew, I knew, that God was in control – as He has promised to be. We serve a God who is big enough to handle salvation for all… and that is a humbling and exciting thing!! What an honor it is to be called to serve this God with our lives – and what a joy it is to do in the context of community.

Conclusion

As General Assembly came to a close, Joan Gray took a few minutes to leave us with a pastoral message. It was very important for me and what I sensed God was calling me to be a part of now that the meetings were over and the conversations were beginning. Joan’s message reminds me a bit of James’ message as well – and so I share it with you:

Don’t gossip – speak the truth and be informed. If you don’t know where the information came from, don’t speak it.
Don’t slander – speak well of each other and don’t be mean. Be filled with love for everyone, even if they disagree with you. You’re more likely to have a good conversation that way.
Tell people “Don’t trust how the media has reported these larger issues”. This goes back specifically to the gossip. The media were there but didn’t really understand all the dealings and had not had the chance to actually read these documents. They watched for awhile, went on what little they knew of the event and reported to the best of their ability. While they were faithfully trying to report on the event, these were not believers or people who had been engaged in this process all along. Not the best source for truth. A reminder for us all to be discerning about our sources of information.
Mend relationships before you leave – this is just a good practice all the time. Don’t let hurts fester. Forgive and seek forgiveness. Remember that we are all part of the ONE Body of Christ. And remember to seek forgiveness for the gossip and slander already committed. Repair broken relationships.

As we close, remember that James is calling us to be a community, engaged in the calling of God: to bring about the Kingdom of God. And James knows that we’re bound to mess up our relationships with each other – so he offers us some clear ideas on how to achieve that community: be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger.

Do not let our struggles and disagreements divide us. One definition for unity in the 2000 American Heritage Dictionary is: “singleness or constancy of purpose or action”. Our purpose is defined in many places: “To glorify God and enjoy Him forever”, “to make disciples of all the nations”, “live lives worthy of our calling”… but the most all-encompassing is “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. … Love your neighbor as yourself." Let us show our love for one another by listening quickly, speaking slowly, and angering little. And let us pray that we can be the united, and diverse, church that God has created us to be.

Amen.

Benediction

We are one body of Christ. One community of faith. And James wanted to make sure that, even while scattered around the world, we learned how to be a community together. Our love for each other, which is the result of being loved by God first, marks us as different, unique and special in this world.

Receive the benediction from Ephesians:

I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope when you were called—
one Lord,
one faith,
one baptism;
one God and Father of all, who is above all and through all and in all.
Amen

OK... movie reviews have to wait...

2006-07-07T11:40:00.000-07:00

We're seeing Pirates tonight... Movie reviews to follow.

But today, found a fun website that does facial recognition on a picture you upload... and tells you who you look like and how much like them you look:

So... when I used this picture:

It said I look like:

Gao Zingjian........................67%
Hillary Rodham Clinton.....61%
Hillary Duff..........................61%
Zinedine Zidane..................61%
Shirley Temple...................56%
Chris Evert..........................55%
Nina Hagen..........................55%
Joe Pesci..............................54%
Neve Campbell...................54%
Leslie Caron........................53%

Joe Pesci?? Are you kidding me?? I think I need to try a better picture!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Second try:

Nicole Kidman..............72%
J.K. Rowling..................60%
Mae West......................54%
Cliff Richard..................52%
Britney Spears..............52%
Kirsten Dunst................51%
Drew Barrymore..........50%
Charlize Theron............47%
Farrah Fawcett.............46%
Olivia Newton-John.....46%

OK.... that's much better!
One more try:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shirley Temple......60%
Liv Ullmann...........60%
Mira Sorvino..........58%
David Beckham.....58%
Eva Longoria.........57%
Jessica Alba...........57%
Jean Harlow..........57%
John Cleese...........55%
Molly Ringwald.....54%
Mae West..............53%

I'll stop now.... but this is addicting!

Coming soon.... movie reviews

2006-07-03T17:46:00.000-07:00

So I recently watch Serenity with Alan...
and I'm going to see The Devil Wears Prada with the girls tonight...

I'll fill y'all in on my opinions tomorrow... because I know you're just dying to know what I think... right?

Uh huh. Right.

Carry on.

Funniest comments ever...

2006-06-30T12:32:00.000-07:00

I'm reading through the comments and suggestions from last year's Welcome Week in preparation for planning this year's.

In response to "If I was planning Welcome Week for next year, I would...", one respondent wrote:

include more diverse music! Suck as rock / atlertnative sounds
Suck as...
Atlertnative... (say this one out loud... it's funny!!)

*giggle*

Perhaps if we do as the next respondent suggests and remind new students to "get lots of rest before, during, and after the welcome week!!" we will avoid such funny spelling issues next year.

Or how about (same question)... "make that more relaxible"

I won't post the myriad misspellings that make these soon-to-be-graduate-students look slightly stupid...

And don't get me started on all the comments about the rain! Thankfully most were sympathetic and encouraging about the quick change of plans to accomodate feeding all these people. Some just don't understand (yet) that it doesn't rain in SoCal. We don't have rain plans because... well... it doesn't rain in SoCal. Why would we plan for something that never happens?! :)

Personalized Star Wars T's

2006-06-06T23:39:00.000-07:00

OOOOOooohhhh! For all my geeky friends!!

My friend John found this:
Make your own SW t-shirt!!

funfunfun!!

Study break...

2006-06-05T09:04:00.000-07:00

Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.

Found that quote on a website sent to me by a friend!
There are many others... most of 'em are really funny.

I've also been able to track the quote down to Lisa Hoffman... but I have no idea who she is.

Updated link

2006-05-25T08:33:00.000-07:00

The link over there ------------------->
that used to be for my Palm Sunday sermon, is now updated into a folder for my sermons in general. I preached again this past Sunday and have plans to preach at least once in July (maybe twice).

Enjoy.

PC(USA) General Assembly

2006-05-12T09:24:00.000-07:00

Many of you already know this, but I forgot to post it here, in my struggle to get the quarter finished well.

I have been selected to represent Fuller as our Theological Student Advisory Delegate at the PC(USA) General Assembly next month.

I've actually created another blog to track my adventures. It's linked over there ------->

Check it out, ask me questions, and most of all, please be in prayer!!

Here I go again...

2006-05-03T16:53:00.000-07:00

I just committed to preach again! This time at Crestline Community Presbyterian Church in the Arrowhead area of Cali. I know Jan, who extended the invitation to me, from our time spent grading ordination exams back in October.

So... totally different experience this time. I don't know anyone there, except Jan and her husband. It's a small congregation (~40 people). And they are going through a time of transition.

OK Lord - inspire me! :)

I am an artist - and I think I had almost forgotten.

2006-04-26T23:57:00.000-07:00

There are times when I think I forget who I am inside. I get so caught up in being a 'budding theologian' that I forget that I was created as an artist first. My art, my music, my love for all the arts - they all are a HUGE part of who I am as a person and as God's creation.

This week is Arts Fest - a week long festival celebrating the artists on campus, as well as locally, and allowing us all the opportunity to be free with our art. What a joy! What an amazing group of talented people are assembled here - and I am blessed to call them friends!

Last night was a concert that was well worth the effort to put on. The Fuller Vocal Ensemble performed first - a collection of pieces ranging from Mozart to Manahattan Transfer!! It was a joy to make music with these friends - and to get to sing the way I love to sing. I was in heaven.

The second half of the concert was a great minimalistic piece, In C, by Terry Riley. It's hard to describe - although the best I managed was that it is like scripted improv.

Tonight was the dance and poetry night - called Fusion. Several dance pieces and readings from our annual collection of poetry and writings - Offerings.

As tonight's event closed, and the tech stuff was put away (thanks Michelle) I was able to witness something that made my heart smile. In the back corner of this auditorium where art was created, shared, experienced, several friends were laughing and having a wonderful time - celebrating the event and enjoying the friendships forged. Up front there were two men who chose this time and place to have some serious prayer time with God - surrounded by the people and experiences that still hung in the air.

What a picture of the community at Fuller as well as the Kingdom of God!

United in purpose and focus - while still diverse and unique. Drawn together by God and our art - but separated by the various expressions. Building community with each other through experiences and faith - while not needing to be united in activity in that moment.

Thank you, my friends, for that accidental and inspired moment of worship for me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After the show

Tangled wires twisting out of control – tamed by a skilled hand
Spoken words hanging in the air – hearts changed by their force
Notes of music ringing in power – brought tears to dry eyes
Bodies moving, graceful and strong – preached the Word

Lights up
Crowd dispersed
Art but a memory

Laughter
Celebrate
Community gathered

Quiet
Isolated
Men praying faithfully

This is… my community
This is… our art, our voice
This is… the Kingdom.

New Link...

2006-04-24T21:24:00.000-07:00

Over there ----------------------------->

It's a link to my folder of Sermon stuff:
The text
The recording
The Powerpoint slides
The benediction

Hope everyone enjoys. I'd actually really like feedback, as I'm thinking about the process and what I can improve upon the next time.

Thanks!

Makoto Fujimura

2006-04-24T13:18:00.000-07:00

Wow. This artist is here on campus today for the start of our Arts Fest. I stumbled upon his blog and discovered that, not only is he a gifted visual artist, but also a gifted writer and theologian.

I look forward to his event tonight...

Refractions

~jenn

Not so profound... and very profound

2006-04-19T01:23:00.000-07:00

So, Monday night I went with Michelle and Jim to the Cubbies at the Dodgers! Cubbies won, 4-1! Woohoo!!!

Anyway, my not-so-profound statement of the night:

As much as I want to catch a ball... I don't think I'm ready for the reality of a ball flying at me.

And then today, in my Small Group, we were talking about Methodism and some of the lists of things to do to become holy. And we were complaining about the lists and how silly and absurd they are...

And Daniel said something along the lines of this (paraphrased):

Do we find these lists binding and constricting because they are? Or because we are already bound to something else - our habit of disobedience?

Ouch.

Turns out I had the right Underoos after all!

2006-04-16T23:48:00.000-07:00

Your results:
You are Wonder Woman
You are a beautiful princess with great strength of character.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

The sermon

2006-04-10T11:31:00.000-07:00

Worship the King!

Luke 19.28-44

Pray with me:

May the words of my mouth and the meditations of all our hearts be acceptable to You, O Lord, our Rock and our Redeemer . Amen.

Guess what?? It’s Palm Sunday! Did you know that? [beat] Oh, you did. Well, OK.

Did you know that this was the day that Jesus rode triumphantly into Jerusalem? [beat] Oh… you knew that too. Hmmmm.

Well, maybe you didn’t know about what comes next… about why this Royal Parade soon turns into a royal bummer for Jesus. [beat] You know about that, too?

If we’re so familiar with today’s story, what does that leave me to share with you this morning? Is there anything new to be learned from the Palm Sunday account that Luke wrote? Is there any reason for us to go back and re-read Scriptures that perhaps we’ve heard once or twice in our lifetime?

While re-reading this passage in Luke, I was struck by several things I hadn’t really paid attention to before:

how the owners of the colt only need a short sentence to release what is surely valuable property,
the disciples put Jesus on the colt, he didn’t mount it himself,
the promise that even the stones would cry out in worship were the people silent,
Jesus’ weeping and prophesying doom over Jerusalem.

So many details that get left out of the “Reader’s Digest” version of this story that remains in my memory. While there are many things at which we could and probably should look, I’d specifically like to take a closer look at the crowd gathered that day.

Imagine with me, if you will:

It is a warm, spring day (according to Weather.com, Jerusalem was sunny and in the 70’s today). The Sabbath, with its many restrictions, has ended and you and I, faithful Jews, are on a pilgrimage to Jerusalem. The Festival of the Unleavened Bread will begin later this week, and the most appropriate and holy place to celebrate Passover is Jerusalem. We are some of the lucky ones, the blessed ones. We are able to make this pilgrimage when so many cannot. But this is the place to be: the Holy Land, the Holy City, the Holy Temple of Jerusalem.

Earlier today, we saw a parade, a military display, put on by Pilate. He does this every year – making sure we remember who is in charge here. As if we could forget! He rides into town on his warhorse, surrounded by his army. I suppose he’s worried because of all the extra people in town, but really, we’re here for a Holy celebration! Does he really think that our prayers and meals will get out of hand?

This afternoon, we have heard many new stories about this Rabbi called Jesus from the town of Nazareth. The newest stories are that he raised his friend from the dead yesterday! From the dead!! I mean, he’s done some pretty amazing things – healings, casting out demons, turning water into wine – but Lazarus was dead a few days! It’s not like he was simply in a deep sleep, or that a mistake was made. Lazarus was D-E-D dead ! Jesus seems to be getting bolder in his actions. Maybe we should go and see what he might do – I heard that he’s supposed to be coming into town from Bethany for the Passover.

[beat] OK – you can come back to the present now.

So, the crowds were made up of mostly Jewish pilgrims, making their way into Jerusalem for the Passover. At that time, Jerusalem was a city of 50,000 people – about the size of Disneyland on a busy day – and because of Passover the population swells to around 150,000 people – that’s more people than live in Santa Monica, or Pasadena, or Burbank . It’s no wonder Pilate wants to make a show of his power and might. It is this crowd that caught my attention, and the attention of the Pharisees. Did they catch your attention? Surely, you noticed their passion! But did you notice their knowledge or their faithfulness?

These people are not ordinary people, they are the faithful Chosen Race of Israel. They have taken on a pilgrimage to a city not their own, to live in overcrowded, somewhat hostile conditions in order that they might worship God in the way that is described in the Holy Books. They are prepared to spend time, and energy, and money to be in the holiest place they know for this Festival that celebrates God’s deliverance of their ancestors and of themselves.

Are we this faithful? Do we celebrate God’s deliverance well? Does God look upon us with favor and say “Well done, good and faithful servant[s]” ? I think God does – but I also believe that we can do more. I know that for myself, the temptation to “do it myself” or “prove my worthiness” are just two examples of how I show my lack of faith in God.

This became painfully clear a few years ago as I felt God calling me to seminary. After leaving Penn State, I began to work in the IT field – yes, I was a computer geek. I started out working in Customer Support and Help Desk type jobs and eventually worked my way up to a programmer for an international company. This is what you do in the real world, right? Work your way up the ladder, making more money with each rung that you pass. The problem was, I wasn’t called to do this. I was ignoring God’s call on my life (for 8 years!) in order to “do it myself”. Don’t get me wrong – that job was someone’s calling, and a great one at that – but the key here is that it wasn’t MY calling! Sure, I was good at it, and could make an ever-increasingly good living at it – but I wasn’t being faithful to who God created me to be. Eventually God got through to me, and I understood, finally, that God had work for me to do in Seminary. But, in my mind, this was only a chance for me to become better educated and better prepared to lead God’s people in worship – not to be a preacher – that was for other people! Boy did I have a surprise coming!

And so knowledge, my primary desire from Seminary before I began, is another characteristic of the crowd on Palm Sunday that impresses me. These people knew their scriptures better than I even can imagine! I’ll confess that I’m terrible at memorization! I can’t remember many verses of scripture at all – except maybe John 3.16! But Psalm 118 was on their lips: “Blessed is he who comes in the name of the LORD.” I wouldn’t have had that ready to proclaim, even if I did realize that it was the right thing to say (which I probably wouldn’t)! Mine would have been the mindless, wordless shouts of a fan at a football game, rather than the knowledgeable, appropriate and still-impassioned shouts of this faithful crowd.

They knew something I might not have realized – because they read Scripture, they had Scripture hidden in their hearts! This man, this Rabbi, this healer was so much more than what he seemed on the surface. Not just a carpenter, not simply an itinerant preacher, but Messiah, in the flesh! Can you imagine it? These people, the Holy Ones of Israel, have been waiting for generations for Messiah! The Prophets had been promising a Messiah who would have certain characteristics and complete certain things – and this man had quietly began to fulfill them all! Only in the last weeks had Jesus begun to make clear that He was Messiah. This entry into Jerusalem was like shouting it from the rooftops! Because, the prophet Zechariah had foretold this day:

Rejoice greatly, O Daughter of Zion!
Shout, Daughter of Jerusalem!
See, your king comes to you, righteous and having salvation,
gentle and riding on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a donkey.

They knew what Scripture said, and could respond to this obvious claim to Messiahship with an appropriate acclamation, straight from the Psalms! Would we have had those words ready on our lips? Would we have known who He was and what to do about it? Because it’s not just knowing and understanding, but then acting on that knowledge.

Being faithful Jews, and knowing what is written about Messiah, the crowd is able to put this all together and worship with abandon! Theirs is not a reserved “golf clap” kind of praise – this is the all out abandon of people at a concert, or the Red Sox fans after their team won the World Series, or Penn State fans at homecoming! They throw their cloaks on the ground to make the path more comfortable, they sing Hymns and Psalms, they shout Hosannas and cut down tree branches in order to celebrate what is happening! They give everything they can in this historical moment, to give glory, praise, and honor to this King.

The next part includes my favorite line! The Pharisees start to put this all together too. They are really unhappy with the way this impromptu parade is turning out and they want it to STOP. And so, they rebuke Jesus, they scold him, and tell him to make these people shut up! Here it comes… the BEST part: Jesus responds by saying “I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out.” How great is that?! Even if we mess it up and miss out on the chance to worship with abandon, God has it under control. God will have all creation – even the ROCKS – worship Jesus rather than let Him go unheralded. Now, I don’t know about you, but I do not want to miss out. I’m not really sure what comes after that part – what if we all fail to worship and God has the rocks sing out in our place. What happens to us?

Personally, I’d rather not find out. I want to hear God’s strong, sure voice say to me “Well done, good and faithful servant.” I want to be able to understand what I see when Jesus comes again. I want to hear the rocks cry out with me, not instead of me.

I’d like to leave you with another short story, this time not about me:

The words to the hymn we sang at the beginning of our Worship this morning – All Glory, Laud and Honor – were written by Theodulph of Orleans, in France. The story is that he wrote these words while falsely imprisoned in a Monastery for conspiring with the King of Italy. The verses we sang this morning represent only a fraction of the couplets that Theodulph wrote – a total of 39 verses!

When King Louis of France was visiting the area, he stopped outside the monastery; Theodulph came to the window and began to sing this hymn. According to legend, when he finished, the King was so moved that he ordered the release of Theodulph .

Now, I don’t know if Theodulph sang all 39 verses or not – if he did, perhaps King Louis released him to prevent more verses being written. What I do know is this:

Giving all glory, all laud, and all honor to God brings us freedom from our prison of death. Praise God for His mercy and grace! Praise Him with faith, knowledge and passion – lest the rocks and all the rest of creation praise Him in our place!

See, your king comes to you, righteous and having salvation,
gentle and riding on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a donkey.
Rejoice greatly, O Daughter of Zion!
Shout, Daughter of Jerusalem!

Amen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Charge and Benediction:

I mentioned earlier that I’m a bit of a geek. Well, that continues even outside the realm of computers: one of my favorite questions from The Shorter Catechism (one of the Confessions of our Reformed Tradition) is the very first one: What is the chief end of man, the chief end of humanity?

The answer is simple: Our chief end is to glorify God, and to enjoy him forever.
Our chief end – our purpose – is to glorify God… with faith and knowledge and passion.

So now go out into the world in peace:
have courage;
hold on to what is good;
return no one evil for evil;
help the suffering;
honor all;
love and serve the Lord,
rejoicing in the power of the Holy Spirit.

And the blessing of God Almighty,
the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit,
be upon you, and remain with you forever. Amen.

It was a good day yesterday

2006-04-10T08:16:00.000-07:00

God is good... All the time!

The sermon went well. By the time I'd finished writing it on Saturday, I was actually feeling like it might work. God had really inspired me with words to say what needed to be said!

Sunday morning I was a nervous wreck, fidgetty and full of nervous energy. But, again, God provides... Once I started speaking - something happened, the Spirit intervened, and I felt like I was on auto-pilot (in a good way). God preached - how cool is that?!

Of course - little things bothered me. But they're not important. The only thing I'll mention should make you laugh. I never thought of this as something that I'll need to think about, but...

I'm SHORT! And the pulpit at First Pres is a little too big for me! I feel like a little kid trying to be 'all grown up'! So, I stood off to the side a bit, so I wasn't completely hidden.

After the service, 8 of us went out to lunch at BJs. Thanks friends for your support and friendship. I had a great time!

All the time... God is good!

It's DONE!

2006-04-08T23:39:00.000-07:00

I finished my first sermon ever earlier this evening - around 7.30pm. I got to practice it in Travis Auditorium (biggest room that I have access to on campus) and I'm feeling OK about it.

Now if only I could sleep!! This is what my body does when I'm nervous... it's going to be a loooooooooooooooooooooong night, my friends.

I have great friends who have been praying for me through this whole thing. Several of them are coming to church this morning - such a blessing.

Time for sleeping, if possible.

Happy Birthday to me!!

2006-04-04T09:08:00.000-07:00

Yeah, i know - sounds like i'm fishing for attention...

But i don't care what you think!!!

It's my birthday!! :)

Already talked to mom, as i always do on my birthday. She did all the work and i get all the credit - which seems odd to me. So i call her and thank her and tell her i love her.

I've been losing weight... and didn't even mean to!

2006-03-29T12:38:00.000-08:00

One of the side effects of being sick in January was that i started losing weight. Now i'm down many pounds (haven't counted) and dress sizes**!!

Here are some pics:
From September 2004, during Welcome Week:

From March 2006, during Spring Break trip to Disneyland:

** Why do we call them dress sizes when it's not just dresses that use those sizes??

Disneyland in T-minus 3 days and counting...

2006-03-16T11:25:00.000-08:00

Michelle and i are headed to our favorite place for a couple of days of R-n-R-n-R-n-R.
Rest & relaxation & rides & reconnecting!!

i call her my best friend... and i haven't really spent any time with her all quarter!! Geez! So... 2.5 days in sunny Anaheim should help to correct this problem.

So, i went on weather.com to check out the forecast... WooHoo!! It's gonna be sunny and in the 60's!! I might come back from this little mini-vaca with a tan!!! Or at least some more freckles!!

Have i mentioned that i love Mickey Mouse?!?!

Zip-a-dee-doo-dah!!

2006-03-15T12:01:00.000-08:00

So... ok... to be ordained, i have to pass several exams (i talked about the Ord exams awhile ago).

Today, i got back my results from the Bible Content Exam (mentioned in #5). You need a 71 to pass... and all that really matters is that you pass.

i got a 79!!!! i passed!!!!!

i know that it's not an amazing score (79/100)... but i don't care!! i passed!!!

yippee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

New preaching date...

2006-03-05T22:08:00.000-08:00

So... I was planning on preaching today... but that changed awhile ago because of a guest preacher scheduled for later this month. I hadn't really put any effort into rescheduling. I knew I needed to... I knew that I should. But I was putting it off... and not deciding on anything... avoiding what I knew I needed to do. (And, really, somewhere deep inside, I want to!)

So... today, during Ross's sermon, I was convicted. I need to stop avoiding this... and so, I told Ross I'd preach Palm Sunday or the Sunday after Easter.

He agreed with Palm Sunday. So... I'm preaching on Sunday, April 9th @ 10:15am at First Pres Chruch in Burbank. I'm scared to death, and wasn't planning on telling anyone... but now I realize that I need to share this.

I covet your prayers as I prepare. And, against my own wishes, I'm inviting friends to be there. I don't want an army... but it would be nice to have people I know and trust there to support me.

My scripture choices will come from the Lectionary. Since it's Palm Sunday, I have 2 sets of texts to choose from:

Liturgy of the Palms - Usually for churches that worship at least one other time during Holy Week (Maundy Thursday, Good Friday)
Hebrew Bible:
Psalm: Psalm 118:1-2, 19-29
Epistle:
Gospel: Mark 11:1-11 or John 12:12-16

Liturgy of the Passion - Usually for churches that are not worshiping on MT or GF. This squishes ALL of Holy Week onto ONE SUNDAY!
Hebrew Bible: Isaiah 50:4-9a
Psalm: Psalm 31:9-16
Epistle: Philippians 2:5-11
Gospel: Mark 14:1-15:47 or Mk 15:1-47

Thankfully, my church is worshiping on Maundy Thursday - so I don't have to follow the Liturgy of the Passion unless I want to.

They've arrived in Florida...

2006-02-25T18:28:00.000-08:00

I just got off the phone with my fam. Mom and Matt left PA yesterday (driving in Matt's car). They arrived back at home base in Clermont around 5pm today.

Matt was checked out by a surgeon before leaving and was given the go-ahead to leave. He'll have to go back in ~3 weeks. So, yes, that drive will have to happen again. But, insurance being what it is... Matt cannot recieve care in FL without a significant cost.

So, he's doing alright. I got to talk to him for awhile... he sounds OK. The current thinking is that he'll not be fully recovered for 6-8 MONTHS. blah. So, his life is being taken in little chunks. No decisions until the next Dr. visit in 3 weeks.

Thanks for you prayers so far... and thanks (in advance) for your continued prayers.

There's other stuff going on... but it all pales in comparison to my brother... so I'll write about it later.

Update on my bro...

2006-02-16T11:54:00.000-08:00

So... here's the next chapter in the story:

Matt had surgery this morning. It went very well; the surgeon called my mom (a former nurse) and filled her in on the details. A rod was inserted into his tibia (the bigger bone in your lower leg), from the knee to the ankle. Here is a poster I found online with pictures of how that happens... if you're curious.

He is completely immobilized for at least 6 weeks - with a cast from hip to foot.

He will be in recovery for about 6 months.

Mom is flying from Orlando to Philly tomorrow @ 8am. Her best friend, Janice, is running the rescue operation - picking her up at PHL and driving her to Lehigh Valley Hospital in Allentown PA. They'll get Matt's car keys from him and then drive to the ski resort to get his car. From there, we're not quite sure how things will work.

What I do know is this: Mom will take care of Matt until he's ready (and released) to fly. He'll be moving in with Mom and Dad in Florida so they can take care of him while he recuperates.

Be praying for my family please. It's going to be a tough time. My brother is a very active and independent guy... who is not going to handle immobility very well, I don't think.

Please pray for my brother...

2006-02-16T10:10:00.000-08:00

I called my dad yesterday, to tell him how happy I was that he is still alive and well (he had a heart attack 10 years ago that almost killed him!).

He told me that he had been planning to call me (which is odd, since we always talk on Sundays, not Wednesdays). Turns out that my brother Matt (who is 30) was skiing (alone, I think) in the Pocono Mountains of PA. He had a fall/crash and broke his leg. He called mom from the ambulance on his way to the hospital in NE PA somewhere.

Well... it wasn't just a clean break. He didn't get patched up and casted and sent home. He was admitted.

Apparently, it's a "rotation fracture of the tibia and fibula with fragments". I understand the basics of that... and it's not good. He'll have surgery, probably today, to install a rod from his knee to his ankle!! (For my Presby/Fuller friends, I've asked Reese for help on this, if he knows any more than I do!)

That said, please pray for my brother... and the rest of the family as we seek to find a way to minster and care for him from so far away!!

Random things...

2006-02-15T20:04:00.000-08:00

1. Presby retreat last weekend was wonderful! My pictures are on my photo website which is listed over there: ------------------------>

2. I noticed a new comment on our trip blog from this summer. Ummm.... I think I got a comment from a guy with a foot fetish! How am I supposed to feel about that? /-:

3. I love the Olympics!! This is so fun! If anyone taped/recorded the Opening Ceremonies, I'd LOVE to see!! We were 'retreating' and missed them!!

Pictures from home...

2006-02-12T16:46:00.000-08:00

So I got an e-mail this morning from a member of my home church. Turns out that while I am basking in 83 degrees and sunny... my home church cancelled services this morning because of a blizzard. (=

Here are a couple of pictures that Betty sent me!!

Preaching

2006-02-08T22:53:00.000-08:00

Ok... last post for tonight. (For those of you just joining me, please go down to the first post of the evening "*Whew* A lot has happened..." and read UP from there. This is my 5th post tonight!)

So... I know that God is calling me. That is confirmed more and more each day.

The last big hurdle, for me anyway, is preaching. I've been involved in almost all other aspects of pastoring... but I have NEVER preached. Never. No, not even a little.

And, I'm scared to death to do it. The responsibility humbles me. To think that God is entrusting me with His Word... trusting me to bring it to His people faithfully and acurately!!

Yes, I know that He will be the one that actually provides the words and message. And yes, I know, that He called me to this... He will provide the knowledge and strength.

And still, I am scared. I am overwhelmed at the possibility - not even having a CLUE about where to begin.

If you pray - please pray for me. Pray that God will be my strength and light. That His words would fill my mind... that I would be a faithful steward of the message that He has for His people.

And if you think of it... remember me in your prayers on the morning of March 5th...

School and calling

2006-02-08T22:47:00.000-08:00

I'm going to keep typing... this feels good to get this out! So... after the relationship ephiphany...

School. And ministry. And my struggles from last quarter.

First year of school was amazing. I LOVE being back in school... I LOVE being where I know I am called to be. This was an amazing move....

And then, summer. Greek. My favorite class. My best grades. I loved getting into the text and seeing the nuances that the Greek can communicate that English just cannot even BEGIN to express. And scripture came alive. And I knew that I was in the right place... God was showing me again and again what this calling on my life is going to be.

And then... Fall. And my internship. And I was FINALLY back in ministry. First year, I church-hopped and just visited for awhile. I didn't get involved, I didn't sing in a choir, I didn't commit to a committee. And I think I forgot how life-giving ministry is for me. Until I started at Burbank. God brought me there for a reason - knowing it was a community where I could feel at home, be moved to action, and serve. I have been ministered to so much by this congregation.

They treat me as a pastor. (I know, more 'Duh!' statements from Ariel.) They're supposed to be treating me as a pastor, since that's what I'm learning to be. But... it's working. They think of me as a pastor - before I had fully embraced that identity. It's been strange - but great.

And then Christmas break. And wonderful time with family and new friends in Florida. And then being sick, and purposefully isolating myself while I tried to recover. And the wedding - with tons of family and friends. So, when I got back to Cali - I was tired and homesick. For the first time in 15 months, I was homesick. Literally sobbing for my family in Florida. I couldn't explain it - I didn't understand it - but it was there.

And so, God broke me. I HAD to take a break from school - there was no way I could catch up. And I had a lot to figure out before I was ready to wrestle with theological issues anyway.

I discovered that I need to not stress about getting out of here in 3 years. I'm not that old - only 32. And one more year won't really hurt my ministry - but will certainly help my heart. Perhaps I might be one of the few who graduate and actually stay a pastor for awhile. I need to slow down a bit, and minister while I study.

I know, novel concept! But... I hadn't really considered it. I was so focused on the end result that I forgot about this part of my journey. I'm called to be a student at Fuller right now. My calling for today and tomorrow and the next year... is to be a student of Theology. To prepare myself for ministry. But that doesn't mean that I'm on hold! It doesn't mean that I need to rush through this season of life in order to get to the "real calling".

By no means! THIS is my calling. Right here. Right now. And, in order to get the most out of it... I need to slow down and really experience this. I know that I will be a better pastor because of it. And, I might have opportunities to minister, even as I continue to be a student.

And so, I'm slowing down. I took a little break this quarter. And I might not ever go back to full-time. But I will finish this. Because God has called me to shepherd his sheep - and that is where I am most fulfilled - when I am living out my calling. I will not step back from this calling... but I am learning to listen to God NOW... and not just look for Him down the road.

Relationship Epiphany

2006-02-08T22:30:00.000-08:00

So... after celebrating the union of Josh and Nicole... I got to thinking what that meant, practically.

Some of this may sound silly, but bear with me as I try to share how my brain works through this stuff.

1. Nicole is now a part of our family... forever.
Yes, I know this is a really silly thing to say... they got MARRIED after all. What else would I think... but... it's permanent... we're a family of 6, not 5. And I'm really happy about that. But I don't think I'd really thought about it. Sure, dad's siblings got married after I'd been born, so I had experienced the addition of people to my relatively small extended family... but I hadn't really ever thought about the changes that the marriage brings. Our family is forever changed - in this case for the better, for sure - but changed.

2. This led me to think about how I felt about that... and I discovered that I'm not ready for that amount of change in my life.
There is still too much of a mess in my life... and I'm just not really in a place to share my life yet. This is REALLY odd, because I think I've been longing for marriage since the breakup with Ed many moons ago (1996!!). God is doing some big things in my life... and the mess is just too messy to share just yet. Before any of you worry about my view... don't worry. I'm not planning on getting myself completely un-messy before trying for a relationship - I'm not that naive. I am fully aware that I will never be without a mess - and that, really, I need someone who can love my mess as much as I do... but... there is still some work to be done in me before I'm really ready for a grown-up relationship.

3. Discovering my underlying unpreparedness for relationship led me to consider why I thought that I wanted marriage, that I was ready for marriage, when clearly that's not at all where I am...
And I discovered that what I really craved was deep, intimate relationship - something that I've been missing for a long time. Most people who know me know that I'm good at making friends. But I'm not as good at maintaining friendships. I'm often good at surface level conversations (like Kyle noted about my obsession with talking about school last year) but rarely good at deep level sharing and discussing. Until recently. Something has happened here at Fuller - and I'm getting better at this. I have some incredibly great female friends (Michelle and Sophie) that have filled that hole in my heart. So I've been able to stop obsessing over finding a man to make me happy... and I realized how very happy I already am.

4. And then I realized that I'd been objectifying all the men in my life... every single one of them.
In my obsession with not being an "Old Maid" or missing out on my "child-bearing years", I looked at EVERY SINGLE MAN... yup, every one, as a potential mate - instead of as the friend that they were. I read something into EVERYTHING that they said and did, hoping against hope that they were trying to profess their undying love for me. So... men in my life... if you're reading this... I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. And I ask that you forgive me. I may not be able to ever talk about this to you in person... but I am so very sorry. I am grateful for your friendships... and I look forward to figuring out how to be a real friend to you...

And so, that was my epiphany. So I'm learning to be happy - not just content - with my single-ness. I'm thinking seriously about what ministry as a single, woman pastor is going to look like. And I'm learning to appreciate my friends... all of them... men and women.

Thank you friends - for loving the messed up crazy me that I am.

Josh and Nicole Howard!

2006-02-08T22:03:00.000-08:00

My baby brother got married!! And, although it was a little strange to consider... I could not be happier. I LOVE my new sister... and I know that Josh does too. They make a wonderful couple, happy and committed... and I know that they have God at the heart of their relationship. That makes me even happier.

Have you ever been to a wedding where, deep down, you kinda know that it's not going to work? You know how odd that feels, right? And how sad?

Well, if you haven't had the opposite experience, let me tell you... it is so exciting. To be able to stand up in front of family, friends and strangers and offer words and music to show my support for this marriage... to sit and watch my brother commit his life to her with his words, and hands, and heart, and mind... to get to SEE his face when he committed his life to her... what an amazing day. To know, to KNOW, that God was there, in the room, knitting these two lives into one, to stand together ... what an amazing blessing.

Josh and Nicole, I don't know if you ever read this, but if you do... know that I love you both (well - all 3, even if I haven't met Belle yet!)... I am praying for you... and I will always be your big sister! If you need me, you know where to find me. Nicole, this goes for you just as much as it does for Josh. God did a neat trick when he brought you into our family... and I will be forever grateful to Him for you.

For everyone else... here are a couple of pictures of the cute couple... (and the new addition - a Boston Terrier named Belle!)

Whew A lot has happened...

2006-02-08T21:39:00.000-08:00

...since I last posted.

Highlights:

1. Christmas with the fam was great! One of the highlights was the pastor at my parents' church (HI Jesse!) gave me a pastor's robe! Yikes! This is becoming more real...

2. Flew back to LA for New Years... and got REALLY sick. Almost had pneumonia. Missed the first 1.5 weeks of school.

3. Flew BACK to Orlando for my brother's wedding!! That will get a post of it's own, once I have some pictures... It was wonderful.

4. Flew BACK to LA and decided that, having missed 2 full weeks of classes, I could not begin to catch up... and so dropped my classes. Before anyone freaks out about this - it's really been one of the best decisions I've made in awhile. Again... I'll write a whole post about this soon.

5. I took the Bible Content Exam on Feb 3rd. This exam is 100 questions of Bible trivia and obscure details that my brain doesn't like. Now, don't get me wrong - I think knowing scriptures is INCREDIBLY important! But... I'm not sure if knowing, off the top of my head, that Jeroboam the 2nd was king while Amos was prophesying will help me much - especially since I don't know much about that king. But... I have to get a 71% to pass... and I won't know that for another 2 months. Who knew that it took 2 months to score a ScanTron sheet?!?! (Note the sarcasm!)

6. Got a job at school. More hours... good work.

7. Talked to my pastor about possibly working at the church and going to school part-time. More about this in the same post I refer to in #4.

8. Committed to preach SOON - probably March 5th (although Ross hasn't confirmed that yet). This has me scared... beyond belief... Again... I think it'll take a post of it's own... (=

9. The last post that I plan to write is about a relationship epiphany I had...

It's been a busy time... and I will share it with you, my fans, shortly! Probably one or 2 more tonight, before I go to sleep!

Miracle of Miracles!!

2005-12-11T22:46:00.000-08:00

I'm actually done packing... and it's only 10.45!!! For anyone who knows me, you will recognize this miracle!

Tomorrow morning, bright and early, I will be on the way to LAX to fly to Orlando!! There is a piece of me that would love to stay in town a little longer to visit with friends. And yet, I know that I will be so happy to see my family in Orlando. I'm tired and recovering from the stress of finals - and I know that there is really no better place to do that than with my fam.

So, tomorrow I head 'home'... and will rest for 2.5 weeks before heading back here for the New Year.

YES!!

2005-12-09T22:06:00.000-08:00

*whew* Finals are finally over! I'm safely finished with yet another quarter! 5 down, 7 (or so) to go!

Monday I fly to Florida to spend time with mom, dad, Josh and Nicole! And of course - Mickey Mouse!! (=

Time now to sleep...

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

2005-12-08T12:19:00.000-08:00

I hate finals week!!! And right now I HATE that I am a procrastinator. I'm so stressed that I cannot function....

Someone rescue me!!!

Update @ 12.27am on Friday: Sophie rescued me and got me focused. Now, if only my eyes would focus!!! Still praying I make it on time..... ugh.

I told you to call me Ariel...

2005-12-05T23:35:00.000-08:00

You scored as Mermaid. Mermaid: Mermaids are also known as Sirens. These creatures were beautiful women who tricked sailors into becoming completely entranced by their haunting voices and found death soon after. Not all stories of Mermaids are about gentle loving sea people. They are mystical, magical, and extremely dangerous. They have a way about them that brings anyone they are around to seem enchanted. They are very mysterious creatures and to meet one... Would mean certain Death. Let the song of the Sea fill your soul, for you are a Mermaid.

Mermaid

100%

Angel

75%

Dragon

75%

Faerie

67%

WereWolf

33%

Demon

What Mythological Creature are you? (Cool Pics!)
created with QuizFarm.com

I have to say that I was comforted to see that not only am I 100% Mermaid - I'm 75% angel and 0% demon!! I think the folks here at seminary might be glad to see that! (-;

Presbyterian Ordination Exams....

2005-12-03T12:14:00.000-08:00

Every year - twice a year - hundreds of Presbyterian pastors-to-be take exams to help determine their readiness to begin pastoral ministry. There are several key words in that phrase. Let me try again:

Every year - twice a year - hundreds of Presbyterian pastors-to-be take exams to help determine their readiness to begin pastoral ministry.

There - that's better. These exams - called Ordination Exams - are the bane of every Presbyterian student in Seminary. There are 4 exams in this bunch which, together with the Bible Content Exam, let the Presbyteries know how students are doing. Most Presbyteries use the results of these exams as a way to label students - pass the tests and you're given the OK to accept a call and be ordained, fail - and you have to wait and take that test again.

The four exams are: Theology, Polity, Worship & Sacraments, and Biblical Exegesis. So, the exams are meant to make sure that we are:

Theologically sound - we're not going to start teaching heresies to our congregations
Presbyterian in Polity - we're going to lead our congregations in a way that is appropriate for our system of government (very similar to the US government)
Clear in our understanding of Worship and Sacraments - since the title we are seeking is "Minister of Word and Sacrament" - this section is half of our calling. They are trying to make sure we understand the decisions that our denomination has made in relation to worship and administration of sacraments.
Exegetically secure - that we know how to read and interpret scripture, using the 'original' languages of Greek and Hebrew.

Once the exams are taken, they are sent to Louisville, to our denominational "mother ship" to be sorted and organized. Then, they are sent off to various locations around the country to be graded. The grading happens in a group setting by a large number of people selected from the Presbyteries to be a part of this Reading Group. The readers of the exams are pastors and elders in the church who have been elected - part of our representative government.

This year, I was invited to be a Student Observer of the process. The idea is that I would gain knowledge about what the grading process was like - and about who the graders are as people - to hopefully dispell some rumors and de-mystify the process of grading. I think the idea is that, upon my return to school, I will be able to assist students in studying for the exams in the future.

So - I went. Back in October. I missed all of week 4 of the quarter - that was interesting. But... it was a great experience! I really enjoyed the time there - and feel like I am WAY more prepared to take the exams. And I really hope that I can share some of what I learned with my fellow Presbys.

So many things to share... I think I'll make a list:

The readers are nice people!! This is really important to understand. They are not out to get us, they are not getting kicks failing us. They stressed over the process of reading as much as students stress over the process of taking these exams. I met one woman who didn't sleep the night before because she was concerned about having the power to "ruin" the life of a student - at least until the next exam was offered.
The readers treat this as an act of worship. Every day begins with a worship service. I often saw readers praying over the exams they were grading. One reader shared with me that he prays over every exam and, if he gets to the end of the exam and can't decide if it should pass or fail - he prays again. He, and everyone else, wants the Spirit to be the one doing the work here, not themselves.
The readers prepare ahead of time. The conveners (who wrote the questions) prepare resource papers for the readers with information about how the question was intended to be answered. One reader mentioned that he actually takes the exams at home on his own and then compared his answers with the resource papers in order to determine what it is that he is looking for from the exams. The readers come to the Reading group with their homework done. Trust me - these people are well-prepared!
The readers actually read the papers and work to make sure they give the examinee every benefit. There are people there whose job is to administer the process and to be a resource for the readers. The readers often came into the convening room with questions and concerns - wanting to make sure that what they are reading is OK.
The process is designed to offer the examinee every opportunity for fairness. The papers are each read twice... and if they don't agree (one passes, one doesn't), the paper is read a third time. We track the number of the examinee through the process so that no reader will read more than one paper from each person.

And my friends at the reading group had messages that they wanted me to bring back to my friends here. So, in their own words (for the most part):

READ AND ANSWER THE QUESTION!! Please make sure that if you are to answer 6 questions in the Exegetical portion that you actually do that. And if it has to be at least one from each section - don't skip a section. It may sound silly - but I saw them fail papers... papers that would have gotten a 5 (the highest grade) failed - because only 4 questions were answered instead of 6.
At the end of each page - re-read the question you think you are answering and make sure you're still answering that question. It is SO easy to get off track - and if you end up not actually answering the question at hand, you will fail - no matter how well-written and theologically sound your answer may be.
Read and answer the question.
Type the exam, if at all possible. The handwritten ones were not graded down, but it certainly started you off on a bad foot. At this point in our technological advancements - you must know someone with a laptop that you can borrow for a weekend. The caveat here is that, if you use a 'puter - SPELL CHECK! A pericope is not the same thing as a periScope - and that just makes you look stupid.
Read and answer the question.
Make sure to make the references that you are required to make. If you do not have 3 references from 3 different documents, you will fail - no matter how well-written and theologically accurate your answer is.
Read and answer the question.
Remember the purpose of these exams. Your audience is pastors and elders. You are not writing an exegetical paper for your Exegetical Methods prof. These exams are to test your readiness to begin pastoral ministry - they want to see your pastor's heart as much as your academic mind. Connect the theological/academic stuff to your pastoral answers - that's how the questions read, that's what they're looking for!
Read and answer the question.
One last thing....

READ AND ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!!

OK - so I sounded a bit like a broken record. But I hope you got the point. It was heart-breaking to watch readers come into the conveners room asking for someone to look through an exam. They were praying, praying, that the convener would find the answer to a question hidden somewhere within the pages of the booklet. They were so upset to have to put a 2 (a failing grade) on a paper that was beautifully written, theologically sound, obviously pastoral - and missing one reference. They know how hard you worked on it - many of them have taken the exams - but they cannot ignore the requirements. And neither should you.

So, that was my experience. I have a few pictures:

Our pile of Worship & Sacraments exams

In process on the Exegesis exams - this is the conveners room. The process is fun - I can tell you about it sometime.

Pictures of the main room where we worshipped and where the majority of the grading happened. At this moment we are having a plenary session discussing what we are looking for on the Exegesis exams and reading through a sample.

We spent the week at the Mercy Center - a convent in the San Francisco Bay area. This is my 'cell'.

Pictures are up!

2005-12-03T11:18:00.000-08:00

Ok - I've finally added some pictures to my photo website.

And in doing that I realized that I didn't blog about an event from earlier this fall - so that post is coming up shortly - with a couple of pics.

The keys to my heart? What do you think...

2005-11-15T14:48:00.000-08:00

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

A change of pace...

2005-11-11T17:25:00.000-08:00

here's something silly that I found on Kevin's blog:

You Passed 8th Grade Math

Congratulations, you got 10/10 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

And another revelation...

2005-11-10T21:42:00.000-08:00

...this one hurt...

a lot.

I've said for years that I don't see myself as a "girly girl"; that I'm not all that feminine. Now, really, I've never thought that I had a problem with that. I liked being the girl that could actually talk to guys about football - the one that guys told their girlfriends/wives to be like (at least in relation to sports). Being a tomboy was handy...

But Michelle asked me to define feminine... and I couldn't do that until today.

And I discovered something horrible and yucky....

I equate "feminine" with "physically beautiful".

So, when I said that I didn't ever feel feminine, what I was really saying was that I didn't think that I was physically beautiful. Ugh. And it's true. Double ugh.

This hurts. And the worst part is that I don't believe people when they tell me nice things - so no matter how many people tell me I'm crazy for thinking this way - I still think it.

Ouch.

So much...

2005-11-10T13:56:00.000-08:00

There is much to say... and much that I can't, or am not ready to, say. Change is powerful... and painful. I'm working through some pain and hurt that I didn't really even know was in me. Rejection of myself as a beautiful, talented, blessed Child of God. Somehow, over time, I have learned to not believe the wonderful things people say about me.

I think in an attempt to be "humble", I've managed to actually convince myself that I'm not worth all that much. I constantly see myself in relation to others and find myself lacking and the 'others' to be superior - more blessed, more talented, more beautiful, more popular... more.

I keep expecting someone to finally tell me the truth - that everyone else has just been 'being nice' my whole life. Telling me I'm talented, gifted, called - but really, that I'm just a useless, talentless lump that is annoying to everyone around me and easily forgotten when not in sight.

So now that I've realized that I think of myself that way, how do I embrace myself? How do I remain appropriately humble and still acknowledge who God has created me to be? Heck, not just acknowledge, but celebrate?? How do I do that??

Just for fun, I think God has put many people in my path this week to affirm things to me that I apparently don't really believe about me. It's been interesting to receive compliments and affirmations now that I'm aware of what I really think these people are telling me. So, I'm trying to really trust these people. Michelle, I trust you... and I'm trying...

In some ways, this habit of mine has been handy. For example: when I honestly didn't think Fuller would accept me, they did. So I got to be surprised and excited about it, instead of it being the appropriate thing to have happen. And yes, I had many people in my life tell me that I would be accepted... including the Holy Spirit who prompted me to apply in the first place... but I didn't believe it, not really.

Anyway, now this has turned to rambling, so I'll stop. If you're a pray-er, pray for me.

A big day for me...

2005-10-06T09:47:00.000-07:00

When I got accepted to Fuller, I was put on probation. Bad grades in college, a degree in music, a long time between college and grad school - all contributed to the problem. Probation itself isn't really that bad: an extra class, a limit to the number of credits I can take, no intensive language classes (which I was able to work around), and no changing majors. It takes 48 units to get off probation - which is 4 full quarters.

Summer grades posted, I've officially completed 48 units!!

So I went to my advisor this morning (Hi Kevin!) and signed the paperwork!! I'm off of probation and officially an MDiv student!!!!!

Procrastination is a beautiful thing...

2005-10-03T23:34:00.000-07:00

I never seem to get much done when I have a lot of time in which to accomplish it. On the other hand, given a short time-frame, I can often get a ton of stuff done.

I guess I like pressure...?

Anyway, I'm supposed to be writing out my personal goals for my internship... and instead I'm checking other people's blogs, responding to e-mails, watching Leno (and Kev wearing Eagles green!). Can someone tell me what my "Spiritual Development Goal" is for my internship??

Last night was a surprisingly wonderful event - the dedication ceremony for the Fred Bock Institute for Music (which is part of the Brehm Center). I say "surprisingly" because, from what I knew of the plans, this was going to be more of a memorial to Fred Bock than a dedication of this institute. The lack of student involvement caused many a student to stay away from the event all-together, and I myself might have been one of them, had I not opened my big mouth... (I'll tell that story later)

Having been offered a seat in the choir which I really couldn't refuse, I briefly scanned the music that I was sent and begrudgingly gave up my day to rehearse for an event that seemed to have little to do with me - the supposed future of this institute. Trust me when I say that I was VERY bitter about this experience, and was emotionally ready for a fight most of the night.

Clay S. and Fred D. have been nothing but sweet about it. I am glad that I know them both well enough to know that I can be in my little "mood" without it affecting our friendships. During dinner they both asked for feedback and comments on the day so far... and I told them. Perhaps I could have been "nicer" or more positive - instead I was honest. The only students involved in the entire service were Michelle and I - and I had FOUGHT for those spots a few months ago. (The only other student involvement I witnessed was as ushers and clean-er-upers.) During the dedication itself, where all the "key people" and/or representatives were asked to come forward, no students were listed. Basically, to me, the event felt like a memorial of the past, not a celebration and dedication of the future. Zero representation of the actual people who are CURRENTLY a part of this institute.

Now, don't get me wrong, it was a wonderful plan... and Fred Bock seems like someone I would have loved to have met. I don't wish to imply that some retrospective about Fred wasn't necessary - since it is in his honor that this institute exists. Rather, I only wished to see some thought of the future...

And I got it.

In typical God fashion, I was humbled by His plan and care for me - even when I'm at my most obnoxious. The service was beautiful, students *were* invited to come forward, students were prayed for specifically - even called "cherished", and Lloyd Ogilvie brought the Word - and boy-oh-boy did he bring it!!

I was moved by his message, brought to tears by his passion for this program.... and reminded again of God's call in my life to work in the local church as a leader of worship. Thank you, Dr. Ogilvie, for understanding this work, articulating it better than I ever could, and preaching, PREACHING the Word.

The night I expected to endure only... became a wonderful memory and a real commisioning - not just of the Institute, but of us! Each person there should have gone home changed and challenged... I know I did.

It has been brought to my attention...

2005-09-30T00:12:00.000-07:00

...that I have been a bit lax in updating here. Sorry 'bout that!

Rachel is correct - much has happened since 29 August... and you can check out the trip blog for some information...

This quarter I have to maintain a blog for a class... so I probably won't update here much. Check out that blog:

http://jahowardmp520.blogspot.com

I can't believe it!

2005-08-29T09:48:00.000-07:00

I just finished my Greek final. Provided I do as well as I think I did - I'll get 12 units of A for this class!! And, I'm officially finished my first year of seminary!

How in the world did that happen?? I am constantly surprised by what I've learned and how I've grown in the last year. I don't feel any different, unless I stop and think about it. And then I realize how much has changed... in me.

Anyway - I won't get all heavy right now - but it's been amazing. Right now I'm off to home to start packing... yes, START packing. Yes, I know, I'm leaving at 5am tomorrow... I really should have packed already... but, as my mom can testify, I tend to leave packing until the very last minute. Which is odd, since I tend to be such a planner, in general.

Oh well... Check out the Trip Blog (link over there ---> ) to keep up with me and Michelle and our fantastic road trip!

And leave a comment or 2!!

It's almost time to fly...!

2005-08-24T19:47:00.000-07:00

Woohoo!! In 6 days I fly to Philadelphia to catch up with Michelle and begin our road trip!! I'm SO excited.

But first... first I must study for and ace my Greek exam.

But the trip is more exciting! Check out our new blog just for the trip --->

The Pain hidden in my past...

2005-08-13T10:53:00.000-07:00

Last night a friend of mine had a gig and sang a few new songs that he had written. Little did Chris know that he was writing right into the pain I have hidden in my past... pain that I haven't fully dealt with. He couldn't know how much those words would mean to me.... but now, today... I'm different.

I'm still wounded... still crying in the dark corners of my heart for the person I was...the person who was lost all those years ago. But I'm learning how to be the new person I am becoming... and his song offered a glimpse of the love and understanding that friends can provide through the pain. They cannot erase the pain, they cannot walk this path for me - but the love and acceptance and support of my friends makes my own path straighter and more clear.

Thank you, Chris, for the words you wrote that touched me right where I was hurting. You will probably never read this - and that's OK - but I needed to say it.
"You are stronger than you know"

A very busy week...

2005-07-04T09:59:00.000-07:00

Michelle and I bought Trek bikes!!

This is a picture of my bike... Michelle's is a little different than mine, but they are very similar. *whew* my butt hurts... but it's a good hurt, 'cause I know I'm finally being more active than I've been. We rode for about 20 minutes on Saturday when we bought them and then about 30 minutes yesterday. I need to put my odometer on it today so I have a better idea of how far I'm going. I'm so out of shape that I'm sure it isn't far... but it's better than nothing!

We have to return the car rack. We bought one, planning on it working on both cars... and it won't work on mine - bummer!! I also have to take my bike back to the shop tomorrow - when the guy put the kickstand on, he pinched the gear cable for the rear deraillieur. Right now I can ride in 4th, 11th or 18th gear - that's IT! OOOOooooops!

Another big thing is that we bought our tickets for our upcoming vacation/road trip! We will fly to Philadelphia (Michelle on Aug 27th, me on the 30th), drive to Central PA and then Boston and then Maine (possibly). We'll head back to Philly via Cooperstown NY. From Philly we fly to Orlando on the 9th to spend 5 days there, relaxing and seeing mom, dad, Josh and Nicole. Most importantly, we want to see the Mouse!! (=

We will be going to Disney's Night of Joy on the 9th and 10th. I'm really excited!

Ok... that's a lot of stuff! I don't think I have anything else going on. It's been a crazy week - but sooooooooooooooooooooo good!!

An interesting comment...

2005-06-25T09:31:00.000-07:00

So I was out with friends last night and one of the guys was teasing me that all I talk about is school. I never really thought about it before, but I guess, in general.... he's right. How sad!

So now I'm thinking... what is wrong with me? What makes me talk about school all the time? Maybe it's because I love it so much... or maybe it's because it's what I have in common with most people... or maybe it's because I'm lame...

So... I have to work on other conversation topics, since I can't seem to talk about anything else...

Other than that... I'm waiting for my bestest friend to call. We're gonna hang out today with her family who are in town. Not sure what the plan is... so it's just gonna be a spontaneous day!

Tomorrow is church and stuff there... and more studying (but I'm not supposed to talk about that!)

Time to go do something constructive instead of rambling here where no one reads....

The Summer Quarter begins...

2005-06-21T16:04:00.000-07:00

So, after my roadtrip to Idaho (which was wonderful), I got back to town... sang at another event... relaxed for 2 days...

And started the Greek intensive class. 4 hours a day... 3 days a week... for 10 weeks. And I will have completed 12 units of Biblical Greek! Intensive... that's an understatement!! But I think it will be good. Already, I'm getting the hang of the alphabet and I know my vocab words already!

For now... I'm off to study some more.

I'm not sure about this blogging thing.... I don't think anyone reads it, so I don't know why I write...

The end of another quarter...

2005-06-11T00:43:00.000-07:00

I'm still having a hard time believing it, but it's true - I've finished another quarter today. I turned in my last project this afternoon and realized that I've completed 3 of 12 quarters!! Of course, it might take me 14 quarters, but that's another story.

Tomorrow I'll go to graduation and watch several friends get their diplomas. I am excited and sad at the same time. Excited about what God is doing in their lives... and sad that they'll be moving on from here. I will miss these friends!

Ok - time for bed. I'll post again when I get home from the conference.

Good grief! I'm a bad blogger.

2005-06-08T23:27:00.000-07:00

OK, so I don't seem to get to this more than once every five months or so. Maybe I'll get better about this soon. Who knows.

Life is good. Classes are over again, finals are now. In a few days I leave for a worship conference sponsored by my school and my program. I'm excited... and curious. It's in Idaho of all places. Never been there.... never really thought I'd go to Idaho... so I'm excited to see another area of the country. The couple that I've been connected with so I can stay with them seems really sweet! I'm looking forward to meeting them.

For now, I'm working on getting more in shape. I'm looking at bikes, trying to figure out which one to buy so I can start riding. This should be interesting, but at least it won't hurt my feet!! (Long story!)

I've been spending a ton of time with my friend Michelle! She's awesome and is like my long lost sister!! Here's her blog. I can't imagine not having her in my life - her friendship means so much to me!!

Other new friends have websites too: Chris and Adam and the guys from Dead West. There are other people in my life - but none of them have blogs.

For now, I'm going to bed. Next post hopefully sometime before November!!

Has it really been 5 months?

2005-02-28T19:28:00.000-08:00

Well...it's been a very long time! And I'm here...and happy...and my second set of finals looms.

Classes are going well... friendships are wonderful... dating is non-existent... and still, life is very, very good.

I'm going to have to try to keep up with this... Maybe I'll start with spring break in a few weeks - keep y'all up to date on my local travels!

For now... I need to go figure out what Calvin has to say about predestination! (-;

Welcome Week is over

2004-09-26T15:14:00.000-07:00

It's been a hectic week of information and social activities. I've chosen my 3 classes and met many new friends. Today, I went to Mosaic Church - again, different, but wonderful just the same. There was an artist who painted throughout the service; a skit; multi-media presentations....very cool. I'm still missing the liturgical aspect, though. I'm looking forward to finding a congregation that can blend the liturgical and modern aspects.

Classes begin tomorrow. I'll be taking 3:

Foundations of Youth Ministry - Chap Clark
New Testament: Acts - Revelation - Seyoon Kim
Patristic Theology - John Thompson

It's a tough list - Thompson is regarded as a great teacher - but a tough grader. This class is going to be important if I decide to go on for a PhD. I've also gotten involved a bit in the student government and the Arts Concerns Committee. I'm excited to be a part of the activities here.

My first Sunday in Pasadena

2004-09-19T19:52:00.000-07:00

Went to church with Erica and her mom: Harvest Rock Church. It’s a large congregation – very evangelical and modern. I enjoyed it and the differences. They are just starting their “40 Days of Purpose” this week, so Pastor Che was preaching an over-view and introduction to the study. He had 3 questions to answer as part of his sermon: What does God want? What does it take? And why should I do it? God wants my whole life; it takes discipline; and I should do it because of the cross. It’s already 1pm – so I’ll make some lunch, read a little and then there is another event tonight at 6. It’s a housing community get-together – so we can meet our neighbors and get connected here. I’m hoping to get connected with Ruffin again tomorrow at the Presbyterian Student Orientation.

My first official Fuller event....

2004-09-18T19:42:00.000-07:00

Up early again. I didn’t sleep well. Starbuck’s for breakfast again – mom is a happy camper. We drove around Pasadena a bit, just getting a feel for what’s out there. Then, it was time to take mom to the airport. We found it with no trouble – it took about 35-40 minutes to get there from here. Not a bad drive on a Saturday morning, but we both agreed that we didn’t want to drive it on a weekday. I spent some time at a dollar store and Big Lots before coming back home. I think I’m finally done with shopping for awhile. This afternoon looms long and lonely before my first event – a welcome gathering at 6pm. I’m looking forward to getting to meet some other students, as I’m finally feeling a little homesick and lonely. I’m going to need to make friends soon…
The gathering was fun – I walked over with the girls from apartment #7. They are all 22 and fresh out of college. I ran into Ruffin and Melanie almost immediately after arriving – so we got to catch up and spend some time together. Also met a few other new students: Jeff and Jenn, Michael and E.V. I’m excited to be meeting people finally.

Who knew so much stuff could be in one car??

2004-09-17T20:03:00.000-07:00

Because of the time change and mom’s natural schedule, we woke up early again. We had found a Starbuck’s yesterday, so we went there for breakfast – making mom VERY happy. I think she was going through withdrawal. We spend the day unpacking and organizing. A shopping trip found Big Lots and another dollar store! We set up the new bed in the morning and a shelf we found at Big Lots in the afternoon. Mom and I are quite handy, if I do say so myself! We had dinner with Erica and her mom, Candy. Islands is a nice burger place – good food, nice atmosphere and a great chance to get to know each other. It was great. Back to the apartment, we found homes for even more of my stuff and then played a bit on the computer. We discovered that the phone jack in my room isn’t working – I’ll need to have that looked at early next week. I can’t live much longer without the internet!!! We’ve been playing “Who Wants to be a Millionaire? 3rd Edition” all week. We’d gotten up to the million dollar question before, but we’d gotten it wrong. Finally, on the very first try tonight, we WON!!!! Go figure. Off to bed – mom leaves in the morning.

Setting up house...

2004-09-16T19:26:00.000-07:00

Up at about 6:30am. Took our time showering, packing and having breakfast. We’re only hours from Pasadena and I have yet to actually speak to a person to let them know we’ll be there today. Wandered around town looking for gas that wasn’t going to break the bank. Gave up and filled up at a “76” for $2.28/9 per gallon. Yikes – I’m NOT going to like this part of living in CA. Washed all our windows – yuck! – and hit the road by 8:15am. The day is beautiful!! And with the sun at our backs, the drive looks to be a good one. The drive was fairly uneventful. We shared the road through the end of the desert with more big-rigs – always my favorite. We had a great surprise as we drove through Palm Springs: There are windmills EVERYWHERE!!! There are thousands of windmills all over the hills and valleys, each facing a slightly different direction so as to catch any breath of wind from anywhere. I took a bunch of pics so we could remember this awesome sight! We arrived in Pasadena around 11:45ish. We wandered for a little bit and eventually found our way to the Housing Office at about 12:05. Of course, they’re closed for lunch from 12-1pm. So, we went off and had lunch at a diner/lounge and then came back. I was able to get my key and a ton of information from Lori @ Housing. By then, Matt Webb had called and he and a friend were available to help us unload. The car that was packed to the gills and took forever to load was emptied in minutes. Matt and Todd are lifesavers!!! Mom and I settled in to unpacking – a long a tedious process that left us sweaty and drained. We basically spent the entire afternoon unpacking. At about 6, we realized that we hadn’t been shopping for a bed – so we made a list of things we needed and headed off to IKEA, thanks to directions from Todd. We got to IKEA at about 7 and it took us almost 2 full hours to select a bed with mattress and other items (a desk chair from “As-Is”, some drawer organizers, a hanging closet shelving thing). We got back to the apt, dragged everything inside, set up beds and slept.

Finally in Cali!!!!!!!!!!

2004-09-15T19:51:00.000-07:00

This morning dawned beautiful and HOT. The sunrise colors over the mesa that is the backdrop to the city are just beautiful. We actually have a pretty nice view from the hotel room, if you ignore the highway at our feet. Because of the time change and the fact that we had planned to be on the road early, we were both awake before 7. It was still a nice lie-in, but early anyway…especially considering we weren’t going anywhere for awhile. Mom found coffee in the hotel lobby while I showered. Then we walked to Dunkin Donuts for coffee and bagels. I think we’re going to smell like Dunkin Donuts all day! We walked over to Wal-Mart and shopped a bit. I found some sandals and a robe, mom found a nice polo, and we picked up some cheese and crackers to be our lunch. While we were shopping, Hector from Pep Boys called at about 8:45am. They would have the part we needed in about an hour and would have us on the road by 11:30 or 12 noon. The new cost estimate is approximately $300. So we shopped a little more and headed back to the hotel. We watched TV and mom talked to Matt for a little while. Matt has a new job as Manager at Houlihan’s restaurant. More money, more regular hours and better benefits (including bonuses). It was a hard decision to leave the Porterhouse, but a good career move. We checked out of the hotel at about 10:30am and walked over to Pep Boys – lugging all our stuff. Arrived here around 10:45 and were told that the car should be ready by 11:30. So, we’re sitting in the waiting room, killing time. We should be able to make it to Arizona tonight, and might even push into California. Of course, with the car dilemma, we have had to drop the idea of seeing the Grand Canyon….but that’s OK. I’ll be here in the west for 2 years – I think I can manage to get there! 11:45 loaded stuff back into car and left. Made two left turns and heard noise! Returned to Pep Boys – Hector found that a plastic shield was rubbing on the right front tire when turning to left only. Fixed. Back on road at 12;03. 12:30 finally made it to New Mexico! Missed a drive-through Starbucks! Oh, well. Landscape very open with occasional hills and mesas – very dry. Safety Corridor on road for first 15 miles – double fines for speeding if caught – everyone being careful. After passing through or by Las Cruces (didn’t see much) we entered an area of fairly rapid decreasing speed limits leading to a border patrol station not at the border??? Passed through with a nod from the attendant. Saw a LARGE roadrunner – thought of Dad and Janice (No, it was not real!) Several billboards for “The THING?” Have no idea what that means. But it is at exit 322 in Arizona, so maybe we will find out. Stopped for Gas at Exit 82 in Deming NM. Sign said $199.9 for unleaded regular – steep but only game we saw in town. Started pumping and discovered the price was really $209.9 UGLY but necessary. Had purchased cheese and crackers etc. for lunch – needed a plastic knife – no luck at gas station. Mom got creative and used the edge of her AAA card to slice the cheese. AAA comes through again! Somewhere around mile 70 at 2:15PM we saw a sign informing us we were crossing the Continental Divide. Stopped on the west side of Phoenix for dinner at Applebee’s. This was after driving through rush-hour AND baseball game traffic while headed directly into the sun. Hit the road again after dinner and felt like we were the only car on the road – only saw big-rigs after that. As we crossed into CA, we had to go through ANOTHER border crossing – this time they were checking for Agriculture stuff. Got to Blythe CA around 9pm, got a room at the Super 8 and crashed. Watched CSI and part of the news before going to sleep.

God has other plans - we're still in Texas

2004-09-14T19:35:00.000-07:00

Breakfast at buffet at HIE. Grabbed enough to take for the road to be lunch!! On the road, coffee in hand, by 6:50am local time. Only 720 miles of Texas left to go!! Should be in New Mexico by 5.

Mom started driving – was raining. Rush hour in San Antonio was fun – took a wrong turn but made it work just fine. Started to see landscape changes, wide open spaces, really cool mesas, longhorn cattle (they’re not just a rumor!). For awhile, along the tops of the mesas we saw many, many windmills – the new modern-looking ones! Such a neat sight! Mostly only big-rigs travel Route 10 at this point. BOY DID WE FEEL SMALL!

As the storms were in front of us and the sun was behind us, we saw a BEAUTIFUL rainbow. Tried to get a pic – but couldn’t remember how to work my camera. At this point in the trip we were listening to Amy Grant Christmas CDs while playing Millionaire and crossword puzzles on the laptop – I think we’re addicted. The games DO help pass the time quite nicely, though. We started using town names for our “name” in Millionaire.

Stopped for gas in Fort Stockton – potty break, too. This looked like the last place before we got to El Paso 250 miles later!! About 190 miles down the road, I needed a potty – which was odd, because I hadn’t been drinking much all day. But, nature called – and so we looked for a gas station or rest stop.
We missed exit 85 because we weren’t watching.
Saw a sign for a gas station at exit 72, so we moved over to the right lane and started to exit Route 10.
As we were driving down the exit ramp, the car seemed to loose power steering all together. I held on tightly and managed to get the car into the Shell station just down the road.
The temperature gauge read 260 degrees – ooops!
So, we decided that we’d overworked the poor overburdened car and it was crying out for a rest. So we let it rest. Once we checked the coolant (and found that it was BOILING!), we sat back and enjoyed an unplanned break in our driving.

About 15-20 minutes later we turned the car on to check the engine temp and found that it had gone down a little, but not as much as we’d hoped. We followed the directions we found in the owner’s manual – and turned the car on, let it idle, with the heat running. This was supposed to draw the heat away from the engine and help it to cool. Unfortunately, the temperature ROSE! We stuck our heads back under the hood and found that, even to the untrained eye, the belt (Fan, I think) was looking a bit like spaghetti – not at all what a fan belt should look like. Mom tried to call AAA from her cell – and found that we had no signal. She was able to connect on a pay phone – and I started packing up our stuff, knowing that we would be changing our plans soon.

The tow truck was promised for 90 minutes – so we wandered over to the restaurant next door – Angie’s. Now, in case you pulled out a map and are looking for Fort Hancock, let me assure you that it is a small, but friendly little border town. Angie’s Restaurant has maybe 15 tables and is owned and operated by Angie herself – in fact, I think she does pretty much everything there. And still has a smile and cheerful word for neighbors and passers-thru alike. We were welcomed as friends and invited to stay as long as we needed to. The salsa, which we didn’t have the opportunity to try, is rumored to be world-class. The ice cream, which we did try, was cold, sweet, yummy and CHEAP – 75¢ per scoop! And it was a LARGE scoop!

Almost exactly 1 hour after mom’s phone call to Shanda of AAA – the tow truck arrived. AGAIN, we were greeted as friends. The gentleman from Sanchez Towing in Sierra Blanca TX was sweet and friendly. He chatted and reassured us as he drove us to El Paso. We got to hear about the local history and some of the local forts – might have to come back and seem them someday.

We arrived at Pep Boys in El Paso and Hector assured us that the belt and the pulley needed to be replaced and then we’d be on the road. He thought they’d need awhile – so mom and I walked to Peter Piper’s Pizza to eat and chat. The place was a bit like Chuck E. Cheese’s – and the pizza was very good! There were 2 teenage boys who were playing a dancing video game – WOW!. Very good…and quite a workout. While we were eating, we got a message from Hector at Pep Boys. When we called back, Hector had left for the night, but Joe explained that they had some not-so-good-news. The tensioner also needs to be replaced in my car – and they don’t have one. They will call around in the morning, but do not know what the exact situation will be until that time. So, we went back to Pep Boys, got our stuff out of the car, found a hotel that was reasonable and right down the road. One of the other customer’s was very friendly and helpful – told us about the area and helped us find hotels nearby. One of the Pep Boys boys, Luis, gave us a lift and here we sit. In the hotel by 8pm – and no chance of being on the road until at least 10am.

Here's a picture of my car...

Florida to Texas in 15 hours

2004-09-13T19:17:00.000-07:00

7am – hit the road, running away from Hurricane Ivan. Little traffic, smooth sailing. Crossed into Alabama around 1pm. Had lunch in the Tillman’s Corner area around 2pm – McDonald’s, as fast as we could. Filled up with gas at a RaceTrac – REALLY slow because of people preparing to flee Ivan. Crossed into Mississippi around 2:30/3pm. Drove straight through. Got to Texas around 7pm EST/6pm local time. Noticed some really strange clouds during the sunset and eventually figured out that something BIG was burning. I reacted a bit to the smoke and looked like I had a sunburn. Stopped in Baytown/Beaumont Texas for dinner – guiltless pasta at Chili’s. Back on the road. Drove straight through Houston – that was way fun – crazy roads at high speed in the rain at night! Spent the night at a Holiday Inn Express in Sealy Texas – checked in around 11pm EST/10pm local time.

Moving right along...

2004-07-13T11:22:00.000-07:00

Well...I haven't been posting much. Plans are moving forward. I now have an apartment and roommate!! Yay! I also got laid off from my job. At first, this was a bit of a shock. Now, I'm realizing what a blessing this will be. I have the rest of the summer to get packed and moved. I don't have to try to get everything done during the evenings.

I'm still overwhelmed with the idea that I'm moving. Some days it's just too much to imagine.

At church, I've jumped in with both feet. I've been asked to go on the Missions trip to Kentucky. I've actually never been on a missions trip, so I'm looking forward to the experience. Also, I've started getting the music program planned for the fall. We still don't have an interim hired and I was getting concerned about how much work we would be asking an interim to do. I spoke to Stuart and he agreed that we need to get as organized as possible before then. So, I've taken that on as my last big thing at church.

The plan is still for me to leave here on Sept 6th and drive to mom and dad in Florida. I'll spend a week there, including Night of Joy. On either Sunday, Sept 12th or Monday, Sept 13th mom and I will take off for our cross-country trek to Cali. Our current plan is to DEFINATELY stop at the Grand Canyon. We have other places we'd like to visit, but that will depend on time.

I'll put more info here as I can....
--Jenn

My first posting

2004-06-08T08:08:00.000-07:00

Welcome friends and family! Here is where you can keep up with my plans and activities related to my move to Pasadena. I'll post updates and plans and thoughts and things....and once I'm on the road, I'll post a journal from my trip - pictures included!

For strangers - welcome to you, as well. I don't imagine this will be interesting to anyone that doesn't know me, but you're welcome to follow along, if you like.

Here we go!!

Ariel goes to Cali

I'm having a bad day...

I'm an AUNTIE!!!!!!

The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis

I DID IT!!!!

The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis

Me? A writer??

There are a zillion of me...

Satisfying AND happy, huh?

Reality....

10 minutes and 34 bobby pins...

Why so quiet?

It's been a little while...

I made it to Florida!

Next 3 Movie Reviews - A Fairy Tale Trio

First 3 Movie Reviews

OK... I promised them awhile ago... it's time to get started.

I'm such a klutz!!

YES!!!!!!!!

"Memories...."

A quote that keeps coming back to me

Ummm... apparently I'm famous...

Aaaaaaaahhhhhhh!

Here's why the movie reviews have been on hold...

OK... movie reviews have to wait...

Coming soon.... movie reviews

Funniest comments ever...

Personalized Star Wars T's

Study break...

Updated link

PC(USA) General Assembly

Here I go again...

I am an artist - and I think I had almost forgotten.

New Link...

Makoto Fujimura

Not so profound... and very profound

Turns out I had the right Underoos after all!

The sermon

It was a good day yesterday

It's DONE!

Happy Birthday to me!!

I've been losing weight... and didn't even mean to!

Disneyland in T-minus 3 days and counting...

Zip-a-dee-doo-dah!!

New preaching date...

They've arrived in Florida...

Update on my bro...

Please pray for my brother...

Random things...

Pictures from home...

Preaching

School and calling

Relationship Epiphany

Josh and Nicole Howard!

*Whew* A lot has happened...

Miracle of Miracles!!

YES!!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

I told you to call me Ariel...

Presbyterian Ordination Exams....

Pictures are up!

The keys to my heart? What do you think...

A change of pace...

And another revelation...

So much...

A big day for me...

Procrastination is a beautiful thing...

It has been brought to my attention...

I can't believe it!

It's almost time to fly...!

The Pain hidden in my past...

A very busy week...

An interesting comment...

The Summer Quarter begins...

The end of another quarter...

Good grief! I'm a bad blogger.

Has it *really* been 5 months?

Welcome Week is over

My first Sunday in Pasadena

My first official Fuller event....

Whew A lot has happened...

Has it really been 5 months?